My daughter recently introduced me to a song entitled “Love Me When It’s Hard”, and I have been listening to it, quite often. It inspired me to write this month’s article, and to dedicate it to my husband.
In any relationship there are good times and hard times. And if truth be told, the proof in the pudding is how the hard times are handled. When the money was low, and there was no “rainy day funds”, what happened? When disagreements arose and a stalemate stopped the discussion, what happened? What happens when you’re feeling low or seeming to fall apart? How are things handled when those “Men are from Mars and Women from Venus” moments occur, and it seems like you’re just being misunderstood? When you’re not functioning at your best, and feeling vulnerable, what happens? I’ll stop right there, hoping that the point has been made. It’s easy to love someone when everything is going well. But what about when it’s not?
I’ve experienced restless nights wondering how bills would be paid. But woke up to find that my husband had miraculously been crunching numbers, analyzing data, creating detailed spreadsheets and researching ways to not only get the bills paid, but enabling us to go on vacation, too!
I’ve been in my feelings and decided that talking wasn’t an option. We follow the golden rule of never going to bed angry, regardless of the reason. Agreement on a time to discuss and resolve the issue became mandatory. This was his idea. I’m thankful that he loved me during these hard times.
I’ve had my share of heartaches, disappointments, anxiety, and stressful times. They didn’t last very long, though. My husband makes sure I know that when one of us is going through something, WE are going through something. And with our faith, together we can handle anything!
When you love someone, you love the whole person, just as they are, flaws and all! I learned that loving someone during hard times requires patience, understanding, and open communication, as well as offering emotional support and encouragement. Loving through the hard times is about standing by each other through adversity, providing comfort and support when it is needed most. Be patient with your partner and yourself as you navigate through these challenges together.
Therefore, I willingly accepted my role of being subservient to my husband. And he has learned to live with a strong black woman. Neither came easy. But we loved each other during these hard times of adjustment and now have a well-oiled machine that applies daily maintenance! Thank you for taking the lead!
THANK YOU for being a man of integrity. THANK YOU for being an example for those wanting and watching. THANK YOU for being a man with purpose and a plan. THANK YOU for being my best friend and soulmate. And there’s no one else I’d rather experience the easy and the hard times with other than YOU! THANK YOU for loving me through the easy and, especially, the hard times. ■