May is National Foster Care Month! Quadnesa Kelly has been fostering with Devereux Therapeutic Foster Care since July 2019. A 10-year-old girl was placed with her almost immediately and remains in the home today. She is now 13 years old.
Of course, all superheroes face challenges. Being a Foster Parent can be very rewarding but sometimes it’s like riding a roller coaster⸺you may be screaming with joy one moment and the next you cannot wait for the ride to be over! Some days are filled with the joy of watching the youth growing up or having fun together and then there are days when the youth lies repeatedly (even after 3 plus years of being in the home) and Quadnesa asks herself why she isn’t more like my birth children when they were growing up. That is when she thinks of getting off the roller coaster. When the youth displays
unwanted behaviors, that is when the youth needs the foster parent the most. Quadnesa shared that the roller coaster ride with the youth affects
not only herself but her three adult children, too.
Quadnesa has many qualities that make her an excellent foster parent. She has a sense of humor, flexibility, and being open minded to understand what is happening with the youth at any given moment. In addition, Quadnesa opens her home to a child who needs to be placed in respite which is a short-term stay. Oftentimes the child does not want to leave the home when it is time. It must be one of her superhero powers which allows the child to feel very comfortable with her and just enjoy being a kid. The children that have stayed with her for respite always ask if they can go back!
The goal of the Department of Children and Families is for children to return to their birth families when possible. However, it does not always go as planned so as a foster parent you have to be available to support the youth and advocate for them. Quadnesa oftentimes is the voice for the youth to protect her from additional hurt and disappointment. Quadnesa is an excellent communicator as well as a good listener.
During one of the most stressful times with the youth, Quadnesa referred to the youth as “my daughter.” That is when she realized the depth of her love for the youth. She and her family members know when the time comes for the youth to leave, they will experience a great loss. Quadnesa has a large photograph of herself, her three adult children, and the youth in the living room of her home. The youth is truly part of their family!
Although it can be a roller coaster ride at times⸺the Rewards are endless. If you want more information about the process to become a foster parent, please call Janet at 508-713-3895 or email jknapp@devereux.org. ■